Well today I found out that my mothers is of the opinion that there is 'something wrong' with homosexual people...
Her statement was acctually directed at us, her three children, when after reading an article in the newspaper about an adoptive couple who refused to teach their child about homosexuality, she said
"well I never taught my kids about it and there's nothing wrong with them. And if I was going to teach them I'd have taught them what the Bible says, that it's wrong."
And for a second in time I acctually hated my mother and wanted to hit her so much. I challenged her and said "what do you mean there's nothing wrong with us?"
She completely didn't understand the angle I was coming from and just ignored my question.

I am still in shock, and acctually rather upset that my own mother could make such a sweeping statement about a subject she has absolutly no experiance in.
I think this struck such a cord with me becasue sexuality is something I've been wresteling with for years and for someone so close to me to put these issues into such a black and white context really hurt...
You guys have known me for a little while and so I thought it was about time I posted about this issue because it such a huge topic in my life right now. I hope not to cause offence but to merely rant about something that has really got me to the point where I cannot think about anything eles.

I don't think there's anything wrong with homosexuality. I get upset when I hear ignorant comments about it. I used to be really against it when I was younger. My mom would take me to church and I just fed into everything they said. Then I started to see that it was wrong to think that way as I got older.. I had friends who started to come out and who confided in me. And I just realized that there's nothing wrong with it..I think just about everyone goes through a stage where they just don't know what they are too and that's completely normal.

It sounds like you're mom is way into church and stuff. I know how that is..My mom has actually toned down her prejudices (at least around me) since I stopped going to church and I'm not afraid of telling her she's wrong when she says something I disagree with.

This message has been edited. Last edited by: CF,

Sexuality is such an individual topic. I would guess your Mum (I wrote Mom at first) is just old school in her views. There are lots of people like that out there.

I can't imagine that your Mum is a hater, which we all know there are plenty of in this world. Look at President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad who said there's no homosexuals in Iran.

I can empathize with your position given your current struggle. My advice to you though would be not to focus on what your Mum said right now as tough as that may be. You need to figure out what you want and no one else should influence that (Especially Mum). Not that you can take a magic pill and figure this out today. Obviously it will take some time.

I know your Mum will love you no matter what so don't waste anytime with that dribble she laid on you. It's a complete waste of time. Focus on you.

And don't ever forget.......Redheads rock, redheads rule!!!

This message has been edited. Last edited by: andreseng,

yeah I grew up Christian-like as well.
When i was much younger, while I didn't actually give it much thought, I think just because of what the Bible said, that I also thought it was against God.

These days (years) I hadn't really given it much thought either. I just don't think anything of it I guess because it's all not a big deal to me. A lot of my friends including my best friend are lesbians (I've even been named "honorary lesbian." People then ask "so you're gay?" and I'm like "No I'm not gay, but apparently I'm a lesbian" lol. But basically I got the label because I kept falling for girls who turned out to be gay).

I guess I believe that people have their own free will and choices to make of their own lives (but I'm against abortion, as that totally affects another person's life).

So Amanda, obviously feel free to ignore this question entirely... but are you saying that you're thinking you might could be a lesbian? Because, well, lol if you and I lived in the same town, I totally would have the biggest crush on you... and that would be yet another girl that's off-limits lol.

I'm actually a Catholic and for as long as I can remember all I've been told in church is how wrong homosexuality is.

Within the last...I dunno...year or so, I've been struggling with my sexuality as well. So, you aren't alone in that. Whenever my mom forces me to go to church I completely dread it because I know all I'll hear is how there is something wrong with me for even questioning it.

quote:

So Amanda, obviously feel free to ignore this question entirely... but are you saying that you're thinking you might could be a lesbian? Because, well, lol if you and I lived in the same town, I totally would have the biggest crush on you... and that would be yet another girl that's off-limits lol.

Rawin, I love you!
Well you know what this very evening I have admitted to some friends (one of which is 100% lesbian) that I am at this moment in my life a (dirty) bisexual, about 60%lesbian 40%straight... So you still have a chance Rawin, if of course we were in the same city! Goddamn geography, ruins everything.

ps. I'm so glad I'm not alone in this guys, it has felt very lonely going through this whole thing and up until about three weeks ago I had not spoken a word to anyone about my questioning... Brumstix to the rescue once again! lol

at every point in ones life they must question everything they are curious about. from my point of view homsexuality is fine. it doesnt bother me at all. i mean what is so horrible that they cant control their thoughts and feelings towards someone of the same gender? i think we all have quesitoned our sexuality one point in time. i dont go and tell people to go and be homosexual or anything, its just their choice entirely and frankly, i support them for being brave against something that has been forbidden by the .... very religious people. since i am in the bible belt area, i was always raised to think homosexuality was a sin and everyone who did it was going to die. peeshaw. what makes someone a terrible person if they dont love the way everyone says they are? i think that its fine and those urges to be with someone of the same gender are natural. some of my older friends were bi-curious, but they chose for themselves whish way to go. people usually try and shy away from this topic, but im glad it was brought up. as for me, i dont plan on being with another guy anytime in this lifetime. but to all those who are, mad props. nobody should be influenced by ANYONE in a negative way.be yoursef without anyone to pull ya down. and if that means that girls want to be with other girls then by gosh thats perfectly fine!!! Ezra Pound, go do what you want to! no religion should tie you down! be who you truly are!

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Originally posted by BitsOfBone:

quote:

So Amanda, obviously feel free to ignore this question entirely... but are you saying that you're thinking you might could be a lesbian? Because, well, lol if you and I lived in the same town, I totally would have the biggest crush on you... and that would be yet another girl that's off-limits lol.

Rawin, I love you!
Well you know what this very evening I have admitted to some friends (one of which is 100% lesbian) that I am at this moment in my life a (dirty) bisexual, about 60%lesbian 40%straight... So you still have a chance Rawin, if of course we were in the same city! Goddamn geography, ruins everything.

ps. I'm so glad I'm not alone in this guys, it has felt very lonely going through this whole thing and up until about three weeks ago I had not spoken a word to anyone about my questioning... Brumstix to the rescue once again! lol

BitsofBone i am very happy that you are brave enough to admit to yourself about your feelings! 100% love for you!

well. sexuality is something i lump into the catagory of, if it doesnt hurt anyone, no one needs to worry about it except that person. i have many gay, lesbian, bi, straight friends and they are all cool. its good you are getting your feelings out, its not good to keep them in forever. when i was younger i struggled not just with the what if im gay question but also the disagreeing with what id been told all my life. luckily my real dad has many gay friends and backs me up that an individuals sexuality is not anyone elses concern and its fine whatever they are. everyone else in my family is fucking nuts about it. my aunt even said to me when i was wrestling with sexuality that "you can do whatever you want with your live, be a scintist, and artist, or work at mcdonalds, as long as you arent two things; a lesbian, or an abortion doctor, then i would never speak to you again." which was very harsh, and intolerant.

now in 8th grade i had a friend who admitted she was bi, and had a crush on me, and i thought, could i be bi or a lesbian? and finally i figured out that i could never fall in love with a woman. i just couldnt, i think girls are beautiful and smat and funny and a whole hell of a lot better kissers that most guys, but i couldnt date them. i could definatly fall into lust with a girl, and have alot of fun (winkwink) but i could never actually have a relationship, so what does that make me? i dont know but at least i know where i stand.

in ancient rome it was normal to have gay sex and sraight sex casually (well only for men), and now look how freaked out people are about it. regression is not a pretty thing.

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and a whole hell of a lot better kissers that most guys,

Aint that the truth! You know I hate to generalise but it's true.

So, right after my first post, I found a co-worker on myspace and facebook, whom I've developed a tiny crush on. Yeah... after seeing her websites I wanted to knock my head with a shoe. She's a lesbian. Has a girlfriend. And is a proud Pride-goer.

So that makes two girls in one day, that's a record. And a little embarrasing. Do I know how to pick'em or what? It just confirms even more that I have the same taste in girls as other girls. (did i just say "other girls" as if I'm one too lol?) But hey, at least one of you is only 60% ^_~

And I've never kissed a guy, just girls, but from seeing drunk men and women downtown, and they're all kissing and stuff, yeah it's true girls are better kissers. Girls are honestly just the better people.

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Originally posted by BitsOfBone:

quote:

and a whole hell of a lot better kissers that most guys,

Aint that the truth! You know I hate to generalise but it's true.

it truely is true, and its less nerve racking becuase i dont know a girl without insecurities, and they are usually the same as mine.... its a nice change sometimes from the macho guys who think they are perfect.

girls are better kissers. =P

thank god for that

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Originally posted by i like wonder bread:
Ezra Pound, go do what you want to! no religion should tie you down! be who you truly are!

Haha, thanks. The only other problem I have is that I live in one of the most stuck up, rich cities in the Cleveland area, so there aren't many other girls here who would want to...experiment.

This one girl in my choir spazzed because I kissed one of my female friends on the cheek. She said something about not wanting lesbians in her choir...that basically explains the viewpoint of 90% of the girls in my city.

quote:

Originally posted by Ezra Pound:
there aren't many other girls here who would want to...experiment.

there will be plenty of time for that in college. lol